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The Survey • Do you count calories? yes- I watch my     diet closely yes- kinda no- definitely not • Want to take the next survey? Click HERE for Survey I. Be a Contributor! Got a good sense of humor, spark of creativity, and a hint of randomness? Be a contributor to the madness! If you can think of funny things you'd like to see on EvilPasta.com, you're just right for the EvilPasta team. Be among a select group of contributors who posess the creative and comical talents needed to make it into EvilPasta.com! You'll have access to contribute your funny thoughts, and then get credit for them when they're published. Apply HERE, and we'll send you further info so you can join in and test your pasta genius.

	"We don't necessarily discriminate. We simply exclude certain types of people." Colonel Gerald Wellman ROTC Instructor

	Where Is EvilPasta? Colchester, VT stuck to the back of some old blue van in a residential parking lot on Peach Tree Lane July 2k3

This Month's Articles...

	Farmer Sows Corn In Search For Love: Man Plants Personal Ad In Corn A western New York farmer was looking for love. So he wrote a personals ad... in his cow pasture.

	Stupidity or Irony? Is it really evil irony, or simple stupidity in action here?

	A day without sunshine is like night.

	12 More Great Metaphors and Similes Here are some more not-so-elegantly-put metaphors and similes formulated by the brightest of our minds... or at least some very creative ones, at that.

	15 Ways To Annoy Men Yes, it's another play on gender. But we all know there's truth in it ...that's why we laugh.

	What if there were no hypothetical questions?

	Letters to Landlords Please fix our toilet so that we can bathe our children ...and other interesting requests from tenants to landlords.

	U.K. Soldiers Serving In War To Get Germ-Fighting Underwear Defense officials in Britain are briefing the public on a new wrinkle in the fight against the heat and dust of Iraq and Afghanistan...

	It's amazing how many people in that office are trying to resolve all their childhood neuroses ... The best thing to major in if you want to understand Congress is developmental psychology. Former congressman Dick Armey discussing his ex-colleagues in The Washington Post

	Cable Company Calls Woman Nasty Name On Bill Philadelphia-based Comcast is apologizing for an insulting epithet on a bill.

	"Play some Picasso." Chris Morris Former New Jersey Net, to a piano player at a hotel bar while trying to impress a date.

	Be an EvilPasta Contributor! EvilPasta is looking for people with a good sense of humor, a spark of creativity, and a hint of randomness to act as regular contributors to our madness. Can you think of some funny things you'd like to see on EvilPasta.com? Then you might be just right for the EvilPasta team! Join the EvilPasta team, and be among a select group of contributors who posess the creative and comical talents needed to make it into EvilPasta.com! You'll have access to contribute your funny thoughts, and then get credit for them when they're published. Apply HERE, and we'll send you further information so that you can log in and test your pasta genius. The positions are currently only volunteer, but we promise plenty of recognition, and some sort of fun little compensation in the future. Apply HERE!