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	"President Union will address the nation on the state of the Bush." Hampton Pearson news reporter, WBZ-TV

	Where Is EvilPasta? Colchester, VT stuck to the back of some old blue van in a residential parking lot on Peach Tree Lane July 2k3

This Month's Articles...

	All-Purpose Apology Form The most effective method of apology for your next great stupid mistake!

	15 Greatest Metaphors and Similes Here are some not-so-elegantly-put metaphors and similes formulated by the brightest of our students... or at least some very creative ones, at that.

	Fat-free muffins taste a lot better if you put gobs of butter on them.

	Car Thief Caught After Falling Asleep It wasn't hard for the Mounties to get their man in a car theft, even though it had not been reported.

	DEA Agent Shoots Self in Gun Safety Class The Drug Enforcement Administration agent was speaking to about 50 adults and students organized by the Orlando Minority Youth Golf Association, witnesses and police said.

	Ever wonder about those people who spend $2.00 apiece on those little bottles of Evian water? Try spelling Evian backwards. NAÏVE

	As Much Use As... This web site is as much use as a snowplow in Bangkok ...and other similar useful expressions.

	Advertising Slogans Ever wonder what all that advertising lingo really means?

	"We're going to turn this team around 360 degrees." Jason Kidd upon his drafting to the Dallas Mavericks

	Find One of These? Did EvilPasta visit your neighborhood?. Tell EvilPasta HERE. Your discovery will be added to the EvilPasta Sightings collection here on EvilPasta.com... and it'll be credited to you. Wanna go all out? Then document your discovery. Take a picture (or two) and SEND it to EvilPasta.