27% of EvilPasta readers have no idea how close the nearest genuine Italian restaurant is to where they live.

EvilPasta WebMail: or

| Return to Current Issue (Exit Archive) | View Survey Statistics |

Be A Contributor! If you can think of funny things you'd like to see on EvilPasta.com, you're just right for the EvilPasta team. Apply HERE to be among EvilPasta's select group of contributors!

	5 More Ways To Confuse Your Professor • Keep "accidentally" setting fires at your desk. Burn notebooks, papers, or whatever you have handy. Whenever you start a fire, no matter how small it is, start yelling, "Fire! Fire!" and run out of the room in a panic. Don't return for the rest of class. • Hide somewhere inside the classroom. Wait for your professor to take attendance. Don't come out when he/she calls your name. Halfway through class, jump out and yell, "Just kidding! I'm here! Fooled you again!" Sit down and be quiet for the rest of class. • Wrap yourself in bandages and come to class in a wheelchair. Throughout class, cry a lot and moan things like, "Why me?" and "Please kill me!" Get up during class, like your going to miraculously start walking. Instead, fall down, cry out in pain, and wait for someone to help you back up. When class is over, say, "I feel better now," leap up, and run home. • Come to class with a jar full of angry hornets. Five minutes into class, release the hornets, scream, and run away. • Bring a vacuum to class. Halfway through class, stand up and start using it. If your professor objects, explain that you "can't stand sitting in this pigsty any longer." Keep vacuuming, grumbling angrily.

	10 Fun Things To Do When Driving The smash hit that took readers by storm is back with fresh ideas. More suggestions for that boring, lonely morning commute to work.

	5 More Ways To Confuse Your Professor There's no excuse for boredom in the college classroom. Try these on for size the next time you find yourself desperate for entertainment. Your professor will love you for it.

	Talk is cheap because supply exceeds demand.

	Murphy's Law 101 A continuation of our simple introductory course exploring the laws of how life tends to not work out.

	This is the kind of behavior that adds character! 10 Ways To Get Rid Of A Blind Date

	Conscience is what hurts when everything else feels good.

	A fun little story that'll make you all the more confident the next time you set off to fly. The Seeing Eye Pilot

	A practical guide. How To Drive In A College Town

	I plan on living forever. So far, so good.

	EvilPasta's Hot Plate... Contribute! EvilPasta is looking for people with a good sense of humor, a spark of creativity, and a hint of randomness to act as regular contributors to our madness. The positions are currently only volunteer, but we promise plenty of recognition, and some sort of fun little compensation in the future. To Apply, simply fill out the short form at EvilPasta's Hot Plate. Click HERE!