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	What is EvilPasta? EvilPasta.com is a clean comedy site devoted to curing boredom via humorous entertainment. EvilPasta is here to provide you the finest waste of time on the Internet to date. In addition to comical articles, 'top-ten'-ish lists, random quotes from stupidity, interesting ponderings, and a picture-of-the-month, EvilPasta is interactive, conducting visitor surveys and compiling the results to give you curious statistics about the EvilPasta reading audience HERE. Be sure to answer all four survey questions each month to get your say in EvilPasta! EvilPasta maintains an archive of past issues HERE. Check out the Archive if you've missed an edition... or just can't get enough of EvilPasta. Want your own EvilPasta e-mail address? EvilPasta offers POP3, WebMail, and auto-forwarder accounts for less than $1/month HERE. Content on EvilPasta is updated monthly. To find out WHEN the next EvilPasta will be published, sign up for the EvilPasta Mailing List HERE. Want to contribute your own comical relief for the masses to see here at EvilPasta? Join the Hot Plate to become a contributor HERE. Thank you for checking out EvilPasta. We hope you enjoy the stay!

This Month's Articles...

	10 Accident Reports Interesting actual statements from insurance forms where car drivers tried to summarize accident details in as few words as possible.

	Gasoline Conservation for Dummies Save gas: As summer driving season approaches, let's think about how to save big bucks on gasoline.

	It's frustrating when you know all the answers, but nobody bothers to ask you the questions.

	Clever Students, Clever Teachers We bring you these reports in a never-ending race of wits between students and teachers as the two groups strive to out-smart eachother.

	Story of Proud Hick from Melcher, IA Designated driver? No way. Only a person from Iowa could think of this...

	How do you tell when you run out of invisible ink?

	In The News: Indian Eunuchs Help Collect Taxes Actual stories... More of the latest news that actually happened and was actually reported in the news from the EvilPasta News archives.

	Application for Jerry Springer Show Want to be on the Jerry Springer Show? Here's what we presume to be a sample application.

	News Headlines Not Worth Printing: • Man Run Over by Freight Train Dies [The Los Angeles Times, March 2] • Teen-Age Girls Often Have Babies Fathered By Men [The Sunday Oregonian, September 24] • Man Shoots Neighbor With Machete [The Miami Herald, July 3] • Clinton Pledges Restraint In Use Of Nuclear Weapons [Cedar Rapids Gazette, April 6] • How We Feel About Ourselves Is The Core Of Self-Esteem, Says Author Louise Hart [Boulder, Colorado, Sunday Camera, February 5] • Fish Lurk In Streams [Rochester, New York, Democrat & Chronicle, January 29]