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Feedback Your feedback will be used to learn how well-liked this article is in comparison to others. • How funny was this article? Use a scale of 5 stars. 5 - bust-your-gut hilarious 4 - quite good 3 - good 2 - average/fair 1 - not good 0 - terrible The Survey • Which cheese do you prefer? American Blue Cheese Cheddar Colby Jack Cottage Cheese Cream Cheese Fetta Gouda Monterey Jack Mozzarella Muenster Parmesan Provolone Ricotta Romano Swiss • Would you like to take the next survey? Click HERE for Survey II. Be A Contributor! If you can think of funny things you'd like to see on EvilPasta.com, you're just right for the EvilPasta team. Apply HERE to be among EvilPasta's select group of contributors!

	15 "My First Book" Children's Books That Never Got Printed • "You Are Different and That's Bad" • "The Boy Who Died From Eating All His Vegetables" • "Kathy Was So Bad Her Mom Stopped Loving Her" • "Curious George and the High-Voltage Fence" • "Some Kittens Can Fly" • "That's It, I'm Putting You Up For Adoption" • "The Magic World Inside the Abandoned Refrigerator" • "Strangers Have The Best Candy" • "Things Rich Kids Have, But You Never Will" • "Pop! Goes the Hamster & Other Microwave Games" • "The Man In The Moon Is Actually Satan" • "Your Nightmares Are Real" • "Places Where Mommy and Daddy Hide Neat Things" • "Daddy Drinks Because You Cry" • "Why Can't Mr. Fork and Mrs. Electrical Outlet Be Friends?"

	Picture Of The Month Sometimes you have to wonder about these fortunes.

	15 "My First Book" Children's Books That Never Got Printed You shouldn't have trouble imagining why these books didn't make it into your local children's bookstore.

	Some Zagat Restaurant Survey Comments Too Acidic for Regular Consumption Based on the opinions of over 250,000 respondents, the Zagat Restaurant Survey provides some caustic remarks that the company's lawyers wouldn't let them print if they named the restaurants. Some are included within...

	It is not an optical illusion, it just looks like one.

	As Much Use As... Twenty creative suggestions for insluting "You're as much use as..." expressions to work into your vocabulary.

	Stupid Criminals: Bank Robber Forgets His Cash Proudly delivering your regular dose of stupid criminal acts, we have this news item for you from Des Moines, Iowa.

	Early to rise, early to bed, makes a man healthy but socially dead. Anamaniacs

	15 Ways To Get Rid of a Blind Date This is the kind of behavior that adds character! Use these suggestions only as a last resort... or as common practice... whatever suits you.

	15 More Ways To Deal With Stress Your second therapist was reluctant to suggest these coping methods to you. Again, we weren't.

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