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	Ways To Be Offensive At A Funeral • When no-one's looking, slip plastic vampire-teeth into the deceased's mouth. • Toss a handful of cooked rice on the deceased and scream "MAGGOTS! MAGGOTS!" and pretend to faint. • Ask the widow for money which the deceased owes you. • Ask the widow if you can have the body to practice tattooing on. • Put Crazy Glue on the deceased's lips just before the widow's last kiss. • At the cemetery take bets on how long it takes a body to decompose. • Circulate a petition to have the body stuffed instead of buried. • Promise the minister a hundred dollars if he doesn't keep a straight face while praising the deceased. • Show up at the funeral service in a clown suit. Click Here for more Ways To Be Offensive At A Funeral!

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	Laughing stock: cattle with a sense of humor.

	If builders built buildings the way programmers wrote programs, then the first woodpecker that came along would destroy civilization. Murphy's Technology Laws

	This is so insane that it just might work. How To Get Away With Speeding

	Shin: a device for finding furniture in the dark. A. Whitney Brown

	Ways To Be Offensive At A Funeral Somebody might appreciate this... or not...

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