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The Survey • When eating macaroni and cheese, which utensil do you use? fork spoon spork chopsticks hands other • Would you like to take the next survey? Click HERE for Issue 6's Survey II. The EvilPasta Mailing List When is the next issue of EvilPasta??? Join the EvilPasta mailing list and receive a message in your inbox the moment the latest issue of EvilPasta is available! Get special deals and discounts inside the monthly mailing available only to subscribers! Don't be left in the dark. Don't miss a thing. Sign up HERE!

	Inspirational Posters For The Cubicle Era • If you can stay calm while all around you is chaos... then you probably haven't completely understood the seriousness of the situation. • Rome did not create a great empire by having meetings, they did it by killing all those who opposed them. • Doing a job RIGHT the first time gets the job done. Doing the job WRONG fourteen times gives you job security. • Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines. • Artificial Intelligence is no match for Natural Stupidity. • A person who smiles in the face of adversity...probably has a scapegoat. • Plagiarism saves time. • If at first you don't succeed, try management. • Never put off until tomorrow what you can avoid altogether. • TEAMWORK... means never having to take all the blame yourself. • The beatings will continue until morale improves. • Never underestimate the power of very stupid people in large groups. • We waste time, so you don't have to. • Hang in there, retirement is only thirty years away! • Go the extra mile. It makes your boss look like an incompetent slacker. • A snooze button is a poor substitute for no alarm clock at all. • When the going gets tough, the tough take a coffee break. • INDECISION is the key to FLEXIBILITY. • Succeed in spite of management. • Aim Low, Reach Your Goals, Avoid Disappointment.

	Picture Of The Week No deceptive pricing techniques. They advertise it like it is.

	The courtroom is no place for perfection. EvilPasta continues the investigation... Courtroom Bloopers

	Diary Of A Snow Shoveler The snow is prettier when all you have to do is look at it.

	"Going to war without France is like going deer hunting without your accordion." —Norman Schwartzkopf

	10 Signs You Need A New Computer Now is the time to face the truth. You really need a new computer. Here are your reasons.

	Just in case you haven't learned from experience... 20 Ways To Go Insane

	For Sale: Parachute. Only used once, never opened, small stain.

	If you can stay calm while all around you is chaos... then you probably haven't completely understood the seriousness of the situation. Inspirational Posters For The Cubicle Era

	15 Ways To Deal With Stress Your therapist was reluctant to suggest these coping methods to you. We weren't.

	Teach a child to be polite and courteous in the home, and, when he grows up, he will never be able to edge his car onto a freeway. —unknown

	Letter To A Future Son-In-Law ...sure my daughter is only 18 and wants to marry you instead of going to Harvard on full scholarship...

	EvilPasta's Hot Plate... Contribute! EvilPasta is looking for people with a good sense of humor, a spark of creativity, and a hint of randomness to act as regular contributors to our madness. The positions are currently only volunteer, but we promise plenty of recognition, and some sort of fun little compensation in the future. To Apply, simply fill out the short form at EvilPasta's Hot Plate. Click HERE!

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